La-loo episode
This evening when I went to pick up DD at day care, as usual I took her to the restroom. She is fiercely independent and insists on not getting any help from me. I comply. As she was washing her hands at the sink outside the bathroom, another mom asked me how old she was. Many times I get that from other moms who are pleasantly surprised to learn my 2 1/2 yr old is potty trained and goes about her activity in restroom all by herself, including washing her hands with soap and drying them with a paper towel and disposing it off properly. I smiled in the 'proud mama' moment. Before the curve of my smile could straighten up DD started pulling out more sheets of the paper towel. I gently chided her, reminding her to not waste paper, when she goes "One for me, one for appa and one for amma". I winced in pain, while the other moms giggled. With kids the grin-to-grimace transition happens instantaneously. I pleaded and coaxed in vain for her to let go of the paper. She gripped them close to her torso and walked away with conviction. I followed shaking my head at the 'helpless mama' moment.
Powercuts that helped connect
Recently saw a wall post on my kiddo cousin's FB profile that read 'Pissed off by powercuts..'
It can be very frustrating for people especially in the hot summer without their fans and air coolers/conditioners. Music/TV/studying , a slew of activities get disrupted, true! But somehow thinking back about powercuts brought back a lot of fond memories of my growing up years. Whenever we lost power, as much as it rankled us, it provided relief moments when we sisters and cousins chatted, mostly played antakshari. We shared funny anecdotes about happennings in school or college and sometimes my mother, or aunt also joined in the fun. We imitated our teachers and their accents and would be laughing hysterically. Gathering in one room in that candlelight , laughing and just being silly - I am overwhelmed by nostalgia. In this age of ipods, laptops, cellphones and blackberries - Gosh! There was a time when apple, blackberry were simple fruits, palm was a tree (or the inside of one's hand)
24 hour TV, youtube, facebook, twitter we're so well connected to far off people and events, but so detatched from those who are around us.
When I was in college I always commuted by public bus. I used to strike up a conversation with anyone sitting beside me, and such interactions have led to a couple of wonderful friendships. Today it's hard to see any young boy or girl not immersed in their cell phones- talking, messaging or lost in their musical world with a pair of white wires attached to earplugs, travelling down their ears and disappearing into a pocket or bag. The ability to work round the clock and remotely from outside office is the worst bane to hit our generation. The good old days when a siren signalled the start of the day at 7:30 or 8 am and another one at 5:30 when everbody had to wind down and leave, makes so much sense to me now. Weekdays, weekends, holidays; night and day - is all one big blur.
My most recent experience with power outage was when I was in Toronto, the east coast lost power for a day and a half. With traffic lights gone, public transport halted, we could not step out. Stores were closed, our electric stove was useless. Our kind landlady who lived in the basement urged us to bring our pressure cooker down to cook some rice on her gas stove. My colleagues and I had a nice candle light dinner - a simple menu of rice, some curry and spicy powders tasted so good with happy, unhurried and uninterrupted conversations.
A friend suggested to go on a 'digital diet' where you discipline yourself to stay away from the electronic monsters all around you. If only I could do it ! I'd welcome a power cut every now and then to break this maddenning pace of life, to close out all the distractions and have some good time with friends and family.
It can be very frustrating for people especially in the hot summer without their fans and air coolers/conditioners. Music/TV/studying , a slew of activities get disrupted, true! But somehow thinking back about powercuts brought back a lot of fond memories of my growing up years. Whenever we lost power, as much as it rankled us, it provided relief moments when we sisters and cousins chatted, mostly played antakshari. We shared funny anecdotes about happennings in school or college and sometimes my mother, or aunt also joined in the fun. We imitated our teachers and their accents and would be laughing hysterically. Gathering in one room in that candlelight , laughing and just being silly - I am overwhelmed by nostalgia. In this age of ipods, laptops, cellphones and blackberries - Gosh! There was a time when apple, blackberry were simple fruits, palm was a tree (or the inside of one's hand)
24 hour TV, youtube, facebook, twitter we're so well connected to far off people and events, but so detatched from those who are around us.
When I was in college I always commuted by public bus. I used to strike up a conversation with anyone sitting beside me, and such interactions have led to a couple of wonderful friendships. Today it's hard to see any young boy or girl not immersed in their cell phones- talking, messaging or lost in their musical world with a pair of white wires attached to earplugs, travelling down their ears and disappearing into a pocket or bag. The ability to work round the clock and remotely from outside office is the worst bane to hit our generation. The good old days when a siren signalled the start of the day at 7:30 or 8 am and another one at 5:30 when everbody had to wind down and leave, makes so much sense to me now. Weekdays, weekends, holidays; night and day - is all one big blur.
My most recent experience with power outage was when I was in Toronto, the east coast lost power for a day and a half. With traffic lights gone, public transport halted, we could not step out. Stores were closed, our electric stove was useless. Our kind landlady who lived in the basement urged us to bring our pressure cooker down to cook some rice on her gas stove. My colleagues and I had a nice candle light dinner - a simple menu of rice, some curry and spicy powders tasted so good with happy, unhurried and uninterrupted conversations.
A friend suggested to go on a 'digital diet' where you discipline yourself to stay away from the electronic monsters all around you. If only I could do it ! I'd welcome a power cut every now and then to break this maddenning pace of life, to close out all the distractions and have some good time with friends and family.
Happy Birthday amma!
Amma. Loving, supportive and totally huggable! A powerhouse of inner strength, a die-hard optimist, an epitome of 'Laugh and be happy, no matter what the situation'. As I age, I realize more and more how strong a woman my mother is and when I compare my college education , my work experience to her worldly wise ways, I am nowhere close to her. Being the home maker that she always has been she has at various times added quite a varied and colorful experience to her kitty. She has sewn blouses for some people in our neighborhood, she used to sell bedspreads and bedsheets out of our house. She single handedly oversaw the construction of our house along with managing all household chores and 3 children. My father's entire universe was his work. My mother paid bills, made all home related purchases, took care of our needs. I remember vividly, we used to live in this complex with 8 houses. There was an electric motor to pump water from a well to 2 overhead tanks from where all houses received their tap water. Most of the time that motor would not function properly. My mother would use a wrench and pry a tube open. Then feed water into it to fill the air gap and then screw the cap back on. Every single time the motor would stop working , which was very frequently, it was only my mother who took it upon herself to fix this. When even that didn't help, we'd go back to drawing water from the well with rough, braided thick ropes. I've drawn water from the well and seen my mom do it until I was 15 or 16. For a really long long time until I started my undergrad, my mother washed all our clothes on an old fashioned stone slab.
She worked briefly sewing and doing quality control at a Garments exports factory that her friend had newly started. Every stint she had to go out of the house to work, she beamed with happiness. She worked extra hard to cook, clean and run errands during these spells. Nobody forced her to work outside the house. In fact we all loathed it. I've been spoilt by a stay-at-home mom, in that, the one or two odd days that she ever had something important to do and I had to get our house keys from a neighbor's house after school, I was angry, teary eyed and very resentful. Nothing screamed 'NORMAL' more than my mother opening the door when I got back from school.
When we moved into our own house, there was a B.Ed college on the same street and an associated hostel. My mother ran a small stationary business out of her house. That didn't go too well. But she built a huge network of friends with the students and teachers. One time when they were looking for an office admin, her short-hand and typing skills came in handy and she worked there for almost a year. We frowned and she gushed with glee. Now I can understand how important it was for her to get out at least for a few hours and discover herself beyond her domestic duties.
During all times in my life that I've felt low or under-confident she always lifted my spirits, she has a great outlook on life. No matter what stress or difficulty she's in, she chooses to be grateful and look at the less fortunate. She's very fun-loving and is a friend of my friends, my sisters' friends, and my daughter's friends. She is way more open-minded, understanding and accomodating than I am at my age. She learnt to use the computer to email and chat, effortlessly. Whereas my electrical engineer dad is still reluctant to make the computer his friend. Adaptable, resourceful and easy going - you could put her anywhere on this planet and she'll be fine.
She travelled alone from Bangalore to san Francisco and then from here to Toronto with a stop over in Vegas. In Toronto she spent 20 days with me sans TV/ cell phone/computer. I worked without taking a day off and she happily lived her days reading a few books and taking long walks. Evenings and weekends I'd take her out. We watched 'Bend it like Beckham' and she loved it. We visited downtown Toronto and Niagara over the weekend , what a beautiful mommy-and-me time it was!
If an optimist says, the glass is half-full, my mother would pour the water into a smaller glass and call it 'completely full'. Her cup always runneth over! Whether you take her on a hike or to some friend's house, whether it's to the temple , for bowling or to try a different cuisine - the enthusiasm is the same. And if you cancel after discussing all of this as you have to work late, no problem. She'd await me at home with food, a smile and something to laugh about.
Never complaining, always happy, kind and considerate even to strangers; Quick to forget, quicker to forgive - I don't know how she does it!
Amma, there's none like you or will ever be! Happy Birthday!
She worked briefly sewing and doing quality control at a Garments exports factory that her friend had newly started. Every stint she had to go out of the house to work, she beamed with happiness. She worked extra hard to cook, clean and run errands during these spells. Nobody forced her to work outside the house. In fact we all loathed it. I've been spoilt by a stay-at-home mom, in that, the one or two odd days that she ever had something important to do and I had to get our house keys from a neighbor's house after school, I was angry, teary eyed and very resentful. Nothing screamed 'NORMAL' more than my mother opening the door when I got back from school.
When we moved into our own house, there was a B.Ed college on the same street and an associated hostel. My mother ran a small stationary business out of her house. That didn't go too well. But she built a huge network of friends with the students and teachers. One time when they were looking for an office admin, her short-hand and typing skills came in handy and she worked there for almost a year. We frowned and she gushed with glee. Now I can understand how important it was for her to get out at least for a few hours and discover herself beyond her domestic duties.
During all times in my life that I've felt low or under-confident she always lifted my spirits, she has a great outlook on life. No matter what stress or difficulty she's in, she chooses to be grateful and look at the less fortunate. She's very fun-loving and is a friend of my friends, my sisters' friends, and my daughter's friends. She is way more open-minded, understanding and accomodating than I am at my age. She learnt to use the computer to email and chat, effortlessly. Whereas my electrical engineer dad is still reluctant to make the computer his friend. Adaptable, resourceful and easy going - you could put her anywhere on this planet and she'll be fine.
She travelled alone from Bangalore to san Francisco and then from here to Toronto with a stop over in Vegas. In Toronto she spent 20 days with me sans TV/ cell phone/computer. I worked without taking a day off and she happily lived her days reading a few books and taking long walks. Evenings and weekends I'd take her out. We watched 'Bend it like Beckham' and she loved it. We visited downtown Toronto and Niagara over the weekend , what a beautiful mommy-and-me time it was!
If an optimist says, the glass is half-full, my mother would pour the water into a smaller glass and call it 'completely full'. Her cup always runneth over! Whether you take her on a hike or to some friend's house, whether it's to the temple , for bowling or to try a different cuisine - the enthusiasm is the same. And if you cancel after discussing all of this as you have to work late, no problem. She'd await me at home with food, a smile and something to laugh about.
Never complaining, always happy, kind and considerate even to strangers; Quick to forget, quicker to forgive - I don't know how she does it!
Amma, there's none like you or will ever be! Happy Birthday!
Nothing in particular-isms
Q : What turns perfectly normal, peaceful, fun-loving individuals into angry, depressed and sometimes violent entities?
A : Marriage
The single-most effective service social workers can do is to prevent some marriages from happenning!!!!
**************************************************************************************
My mother always says , a married couple needs a child to fill the emotional void that sets in, in a few years of being married. She believes all the differences and small arguments will be drowned with love and affection as the child will form a "bridge" between the husband and wife! I do whole heartedly agree with her now.
She couldn't be more right and more wrong! Bridge no doubt! When previously we would have been unable to get to each other , at times, we now spar frequently on the no-toll bridge!!!!
***********************************************************************************
I told my husband he should make a concious effort at being nice to me.
He replied with a grin that he'd take a "stab" at it!
***********************************************************************************
This one's from a reality TV show I was watching a few days back :
A thirty something woman is dealing with a relationship conundrum involving a chilhood friend turned love interest and an ex , she's discussing things with her 90 plus grandmom. She asks , " Gran, you were married to grandpa for 64 yrs, did you ever consider divorce?" Granny, sweet and wrinkled like a perfect raisin replies" Divorce - never! Murder - everyday!"
A : Marriage
The single-most effective service social workers can do is to prevent some marriages from happenning!!!!
**************************************************************************************
My mother always says , a married couple needs a child to fill the emotional void that sets in, in a few years of being married. She believes all the differences and small arguments will be drowned with love and affection as the child will form a "bridge" between the husband and wife! I do whole heartedly agree with her now.
She couldn't be more right and more wrong! Bridge no doubt! When previously we would have been unable to get to each other , at times, we now spar frequently on the no-toll bridge!!!!
***********************************************************************************
I told my husband he should make a concious effort at being nice to me.
He replied with a grin that he'd take a "stab" at it!
***********************************************************************************
This one's from a reality TV show I was watching a few days back :
A thirty something woman is dealing with a relationship conundrum involving a chilhood friend turned love interest and an ex , she's discussing things with her 90 plus grandmom. She asks , " Gran, you were married to grandpa for 64 yrs, did you ever consider divorce?" Granny, sweet and wrinkled like a perfect raisin replies" Divorce - never! Murder - everyday!"
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