A rolling stone gathers no moss.
But the mind is like a rolling stone with magnet on one side and fevicol on the other, picking up everything in its way. As if the wandering mind and its stiff resistance to stay focussed weren't enough, we now have the internet - a galaxy of information explosion through which the mind rolls on uncontrollably.
I spend a lot of time on the internet, I seriously need to wean myself off that and exercise some discipline. I have become this person who - if I need to clean out my closet and have forty five minutes to do so, will first starty by googling 'How to organize your closet' - from there jump to
House plants - A simple, satisfying way to decorate your living space - to
How to grow Orchids - to
Dealing with your toddler's tantrums - to ..... and an hour and twenty minutes have passed and I have not lifted a finger except to click my mouse button!
My God!
If I make myself stop reading about movies and filmstars , then I find I am suddenly addicted to something else. The topic of interest varies - it's recipes or yoga or child rearing and so on.
I keep trying to straighten this , but like a grandparent that spoils a child, undermining the parent's efforts at disciplining, the internet thwarts my every resolve. It's a web no doubt, I am snarled and it's world wide, where can I escape to? As Jim Carrey says in Mask - Somebody, stop me!
IMO
Five words I don't like :
Let's get back to work
Four words I don't like :
The weekend is over
Three words I don't like:
But you promised...
Two words I don't like
1) It's closed ( as in a restaurant or store)
2) House full ( or 'full house' to be correct)
One word I don't like
mortgage
p.s : As you expect ( more like dread !) a post of words I like will follow.
Let's get back to work
Four words I don't like :
The weekend is over
Three words I don't like:
But you promised...
Two words I don't like
1) It's closed ( as in a restaurant or store)
2) House full ( or 'full house' to be correct)
One word I don't like
mortgage
p.s : As you expect ( more like dread !) a post of words I like will follow.
Change the music!
This ever happen to you?
You listen to 'vande mataram' and suddenly feel a surge of patriotsim - for the duration of the song or until a few minutes later ? You listen to a peppy number and feel like tapping your feet and going 'shake shake' ? Of course you have! The music and lyrics of a song have a strong influence on the way we feel - be it for a few minutes alone - to snap us out of certain moods and drive us into some states of mind! We have lullabies to make little ones fall asleep, hymns and devotional songs played in places of worship, fast music with beats for exercise classes, ghazals and lilting classical music for wedding receptions and so on... That said, I am now zooming in to Indian film music. This potent force - playing in petty tea stalls to petite I-pods - touches millions! There is a song for every mood, occasion and feeling. Songs in the rain, in the snow, about meeting and parting , on nature's beauty to a soldier's duty (sorry , rhyming is this affliction I have, when it comes to me, I just can't make it go away!).
In particular, when I listen to songs on love failure, I feel why is there always so much hurt and despair alone? This discussion is not about how to respond to love failure and cope with it ( fodder for another post sometime later). The point I am trying to make is , why is there only moping and pining ( in these songs)? The psyche of songs like
1) 'Accha sila diya tune mere pyar ka...' - fantastic song that made Sonu Nigam a household name
2) 'Tujhe yaad na meri aayi, kisi se ab kya kehna...- from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
3) Sach mere yaar hai ..... baaki bekar hai - from Sagar
Whether you have actually experienced a heart break in life or not, through these songs you do vicariously feel the ache and hurt. All the missing and suffering when two people in love are temporarily separated is alright, but what's with all songs on unrequited love or betrayal or otherwise- having the same theme of
'My life is not worth living without you, I am a non-entity without you...' - despair, dejection and bawling!
If it's the guy, he's drowning himself in alcohol and if it's the girl, she's weeping to the point of dehydration - I have no gender bias, but the Indian filmmakers have kept it this way, so far!
Why can't we have songs like
Aretha Franklin's 'I will Survive' - She even goes on to say 'I should have changed that stupid lock, you're not welcome anymore' to the person who broke her heart and left her.
Another example Wham's
'Last Christmas I gave you my heart..... This year I'll give it to someone special'
Or another song I've heard -
' Follow me everything is alright......
If you want to leave, I can guarantee
You won't find nobody else like me'
We need to have more songs like these which talk about moving on, turning a new leaf and getting over love that's no longer alive. Though there have been movie plots that have dealt with this positivity, I can't seem to think of any song lyrics that reflect this pluck!
Even the one or two songs that come to mind like Ashiqui's
'Ab tere bin jee lenge hum...' start off defiantly but go on to describe only pain and hurt.
Songs of sadness and heartache are deeply touching and many are my favorites too. They can transport you to another time and place. I am not against this very sentiment, but can we not also have songs of hope, of treating life itself as a more precious commodity than just one person or one incident ? With some choice words and the accompaniment of some good music, these songs could actually inject some courage and spirit into many folks that are grieving and moping!
May be like : ' Tumse bichad ke zindagi se kuch paaya hai, kya kahe ek alag hi mazaa aaya hai'
or perhaps - 'Tune humara dil thoda hai, vaapas aaoge tho haddi thod denge' LOL!
or something like that! :-) What say?
You listen to 'vande mataram' and suddenly feel a surge of patriotsim - for the duration of the song or until a few minutes later ? You listen to a peppy number and feel like tapping your feet and going 'shake shake' ? Of course you have! The music and lyrics of a song have a strong influence on the way we feel - be it for a few minutes alone - to snap us out of certain moods and drive us into some states of mind! We have lullabies to make little ones fall asleep, hymns and devotional songs played in places of worship, fast music with beats for exercise classes, ghazals and lilting classical music for wedding receptions and so on... That said, I am now zooming in to Indian film music. This potent force - playing in petty tea stalls to petite I-pods - touches millions! There is a song for every mood, occasion and feeling. Songs in the rain, in the snow, about meeting and parting , on nature's beauty to a soldier's duty (sorry , rhyming is this affliction I have, when it comes to me, I just can't make it go away!).
In particular, when I listen to songs on love failure, I feel why is there always so much hurt and despair alone? This discussion is not about how to respond to love failure and cope with it ( fodder for another post sometime later). The point I am trying to make is , why is there only moping and pining ( in these songs)? The psyche of songs like
1) 'Accha sila diya tune mere pyar ka...' - fantastic song that made Sonu Nigam a household name
2) 'Tujhe yaad na meri aayi, kisi se ab kya kehna...- from Kuch Kuch Hota Hai
3) Sach mere yaar hai ..... baaki bekar hai - from Sagar
Whether you have actually experienced a heart break in life or not, through these songs you do vicariously feel the ache and hurt. All the missing and suffering when two people in love are temporarily separated is alright, but what's with all songs on unrequited love or betrayal or otherwise- having the same theme of
'My life is not worth living without you, I am a non-entity without you...' - despair, dejection and bawling!
If it's the guy, he's drowning himself in alcohol and if it's the girl, she's weeping to the point of dehydration - I have no gender bias, but the Indian filmmakers have kept it this way, so far!
Why can't we have songs like
Aretha Franklin's 'I will Survive' - She even goes on to say 'I should have changed that stupid lock, you're not welcome anymore' to the person who broke her heart and left her.
Another example Wham's
'Last Christmas I gave you my heart..... This year I'll give it to someone special'
Or another song I've heard -
' Follow me everything is alright......
If you want to leave, I can guarantee
You won't find nobody else like me'
We need to have more songs like these which talk about moving on, turning a new leaf and getting over love that's no longer alive. Though there have been movie plots that have dealt with this positivity, I can't seem to think of any song lyrics that reflect this pluck!
Even the one or two songs that come to mind like Ashiqui's
'Ab tere bin jee lenge hum...' start off defiantly but go on to describe only pain and hurt.
Songs of sadness and heartache are deeply touching and many are my favorites too. They can transport you to another time and place. I am not against this very sentiment, but can we not also have songs of hope, of treating life itself as a more precious commodity than just one person or one incident ? With some choice words and the accompaniment of some good music, these songs could actually inject some courage and spirit into many folks that are grieving and moping!
May be like : ' Tumse bichad ke zindagi se kuch paaya hai, kya kahe ek alag hi mazaa aaya hai'
or perhaps - 'Tune humara dil thoda hai, vaapas aaoge tho haddi thod denge' LOL!
or something like that! :-) What say?
The Road Not taken
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood.... I studied Robert Frost's poem, probably also answered a couple of questions on it in my English examination , but never really took the message home!
After II P.U.C exams in april of 1994 and writing the Common entrance exams for Engineering/Medicine/Dentistry in May, I along with my brood, awaited the results and the interview - Counselling, it was called -for admission into colleges. Designing things was not my passion, equations didn't entice me! But I wanted to study to become an engineer. Because that's what most of my friends wanted to do and if you couldn't manage to get into a professional course, you were no good!
At that time, there were cases going on in court for fixing the percentage of seats that would be reserved for students from different ethnic backgrounds! For most of my friends and me, the general merit quota was the only channel and that was getting squeezed thinner by the day! Protests and rallies went on and newspapers threw up a differ number each week - days and weeks passed and the fate of thousands of us hung in this tangled balance. My rank was not particularly impressive, but I was somewhat confident of securing an admission in an engineering college. Some of my friends joined B.Sc. and I debated with myself on whether I was doing the right thing by putting all my eggs in the engineering degree basket. One morning the percentage rose to 80% - a very dear friend of mine called me - I ran to my neighbor's who lived across from us, where we received important phone calls as we didn't yet have a telephone at home back then - "Call for Sujatha" called out aunty and I sprinted across. My friend talked to me for five minutes discussing the chaotic situation and advised me to join B.Sc just in case... I thanked her and came back home. My parents' thoughts echoed my friend's words. My own fear had grown to a Godzilla size. So I went back to my college where I studied my P.U.C , 2 months after classes had commenced, to secure an admission for B.Sc. The Principal was supportive of my case, but gently chided me for running the rat race toward engineering. I wanted 'Microbiology' , she said I would have walked through if I had come during regular admission time. The class was full and she could not offer me that. She said 'Clinical nutrition and Dietitics' had some openings and I could take it if I wanted. I did.
For almost 4 weeks I worked overtime catching up on lab work, notes and completing my Practical record up to date. I still felt very sore at the thought of not being able to make it to engineering. The course was otherwise very interesting. Our nutrition lab comprised of planning diets for a sedentary youth, a pregnant lady, an athlete and so on. We had to meet the carbohydrate/protein/fat/water requirement for each meal and keep the calorie intake within a certain level. We laughed when we came up with adult meals like - 1 idli, 1 cup of sprouts , a banana for breakfast. Or 1 roti, 1 cup of rice, small cup of yogurt and a small salad for lunch. I realize now those weren't ridiculously small, but actually the right kind of portions for today's inactive lifestyles.
Before the end of a month into my new course the counselling sessions had started and my turn came - I went for it and got into an engineering programme, thereby abruptly ending the B.Sc course I had barely joined. At that time, it was peer pressure, societal pressure and my own imagined pressures that pushed me into studying engineering. Fast forward fifteen years, and I now enjoy reading and learning about olive oil, vinegar, almonds and spinach. I devour every article I chance upon on metabolism, exercise, and food. It feels like a career in nutrition and dietitics would have been so right for me!
But then from time to time I have wanted to be a doctor, a lawyer, a biologist, a dancer, an actress ( oh! that I still fantasize about), a detective, a teacher and so on..
In the past few years, my mind has been toying with a few more options!!!!
In my case :
A few roads ( not two) diverged in a yellow wood
I took the one heavily trodden upon, I am bugged
I keep turning to see
Most other roads seem like fun to me
I think I am going to run back to the fork
Stand there for a while and wonder
About the road I took
And the one yet to be taken!
In conclusion :
1) A girl's life is full of choices
2) I am a very confused person
3) And Rober Frost , definitely had it easy!
After II P.U.C exams in april of 1994 and writing the Common entrance exams for Engineering/Medicine/Dentistry in May, I along with my brood, awaited the results and the interview - Counselling, it was called -for admission into colleges. Designing things was not my passion, equations didn't entice me! But I wanted to study to become an engineer. Because that's what most of my friends wanted to do and if you couldn't manage to get into a professional course, you were no good!
At that time, there were cases going on in court for fixing the percentage of seats that would be reserved for students from different ethnic backgrounds! For most of my friends and me, the general merit quota was the only channel and that was getting squeezed thinner by the day! Protests and rallies went on and newspapers threw up a differ number each week - days and weeks passed and the fate of thousands of us hung in this tangled balance. My rank was not particularly impressive, but I was somewhat confident of securing an admission in an engineering college. Some of my friends joined B.Sc. and I debated with myself on whether I was doing the right thing by putting all my eggs in the engineering degree basket. One morning the percentage rose to 80% - a very dear friend of mine called me - I ran to my neighbor's who lived across from us, where we received important phone calls as we didn't yet have a telephone at home back then - "Call for Sujatha" called out aunty and I sprinted across. My friend talked to me for five minutes discussing the chaotic situation and advised me to join B.Sc just in case... I thanked her and came back home. My parents' thoughts echoed my friend's words. My own fear had grown to a Godzilla size. So I went back to my college where I studied my P.U.C , 2 months after classes had commenced, to secure an admission for B.Sc. The Principal was supportive of my case, but gently chided me for running the rat race toward engineering. I wanted 'Microbiology' , she said I would have walked through if I had come during regular admission time. The class was full and she could not offer me that. She said 'Clinical nutrition and Dietitics' had some openings and I could take it if I wanted. I did.
For almost 4 weeks I worked overtime catching up on lab work, notes and completing my Practical record up to date. I still felt very sore at the thought of not being able to make it to engineering. The course was otherwise very interesting. Our nutrition lab comprised of planning diets for a sedentary youth, a pregnant lady, an athlete and so on. We had to meet the carbohydrate/protein/fat/water requirement for each meal and keep the calorie intake within a certain level. We laughed when we came up with adult meals like - 1 idli, 1 cup of sprouts , a banana for breakfast. Or 1 roti, 1 cup of rice, small cup of yogurt and a small salad for lunch. I realize now those weren't ridiculously small, but actually the right kind of portions for today's inactive lifestyles.
Before the end of a month into my new course the counselling sessions had started and my turn came - I went for it and got into an engineering programme, thereby abruptly ending the B.Sc course I had barely joined. At that time, it was peer pressure, societal pressure and my own imagined pressures that pushed me into studying engineering. Fast forward fifteen years, and I now enjoy reading and learning about olive oil, vinegar, almonds and spinach. I devour every article I chance upon on metabolism, exercise, and food. It feels like a career in nutrition and dietitics would have been so right for me!
But then from time to time I have wanted to be a doctor, a lawyer, a biologist, a dancer, an actress ( oh! that I still fantasize about), a detective, a teacher and so on..
In the past few years, my mind has been toying with a few more options!!!!
In my case :
A few roads ( not two) diverged in a yellow wood
I took the one heavily trodden upon, I am bugged
I keep turning to see
Most other roads seem like fun to me
I think I am going to run back to the fork
Stand there for a while and wonder
About the road I took
And the one yet to be taken!
In conclusion :
1) A girl's life is full of choices
2) I am a very confused person
3) And Rober Frost , definitely had it easy!
Laugh and be merry!
I remember the first 3 lines of this poem from high school English. I remember it from time to time. Thanks to the world wide web, today I googled and found this poem in less then 3 seconds. Here it is in its entirety.
Laugh and be merry, remember, better the world with a song,
Better the world with a blow in the teeth of a wrong.
Laugh, for the time is brief, a thread the length of a span.
Laugh and be proud to belong to the old proud pageant of man.
Laugh and be merry: remember, in olden time.
God made Heaven and Earth for joy He took in a rhyme,
Made them, and filled them full with the strong red wine of His mirth
The splendid joy of the stars: the joy of the earth.
So we must laugh and drink from the deep blue cup of the sky,
Join the jubilant song of the great stars sweeping by,
Laugh, and battle, and work, and drink of the wine outpoured
In the dear green earth, the sign of the joy of the Lord.
Laugh and be merry together, like brothers akin,
Guesting awhile in the rooms of a beautiful inn,
Glad till the dancing stops, and the lilt of the music ends.
Laugh till the game is played; and be you merry, my friends.
by John Masefield
Laugh and be merry, remember, better the world with a song,
Better the world with a blow in the teeth of a wrong.
Laugh, for the time is brief, a thread the length of a span.
Laugh and be proud to belong to the old proud pageant of man.
Laugh and be merry: remember, in olden time.
God made Heaven and Earth for joy He took in a rhyme,
Made them, and filled them full with the strong red wine of His mirth
The splendid joy of the stars: the joy of the earth.
So we must laugh and drink from the deep blue cup of the sky,
Join the jubilant song of the great stars sweeping by,
Laugh, and battle, and work, and drink of the wine outpoured
In the dear green earth, the sign of the joy of the Lord.
Laugh and be merry together, like brothers akin,
Guesting awhile in the rooms of a beautiful inn,
Glad till the dancing stops, and the lilt of the music ends.
Laugh till the game is played; and be you merry, my friends.
by John Masefield
Sign post found in Lalbagh, Bangalore
Direction: an explicit instruction, assistance in pointing out the proper route — usually used in plural
If tomorrow comes....
Note : This has nothing to do with Sidney Sheldon's novel with the same title!
I dropped my daughter off at day care this morning. Nothing unusual, but tis a monday morning and she lingered and looked at me with longing eyes as I was waving bye to her. She wanted to be with me rather than go into her daycare and I wanted to be with her much rather than come in to work. We gazed at each other like lovers separated by society,family and circumstances. The door closed in my face and as I got into my car and started driving, an incident narrated by my uncle came to mind. This happened several years ago when my uncle's daughter, cousin M was in kindergarten.
Mama, as I call my uncle, used to drop off his daughter at school and proceed to his workplace. M always whined and fussed about going to school. Everyday, mami and/or mama had to explain to her why she needs to go to school, how it's important for her to get a good education that would make her independent and add value and blah blah! And she was never convinced. They'd show her examples of her older sibling, cousins and other kids who also went to school. And she'd point to every kid she knew in the 0-3 yrs age group who got to stay home. Explaining the age logic had no effect on her. This process would also delay mama in getting to work. Sometimes, when M lay on the floor protesting, mama would exclaim "The only difference between me and her is that I cannot lay on the floor and cry like her, I too do not feel like going to work!"
One morning as M was doing her usual routine of " I don't feel like going to school!", mama quite unexpectedly said in a fit of frustration, "Okay, you don't have to go. You get to stay home today." M was overjoyed to hear this and immediately overcome by skepticism at this sudden gratuitousness. Mama continued,"But tomorrow morning, you'll get ready without any complaining, absolutely no fussing!"
Suited her just fine. Who has seen tomorrow? Today is here and now and the real deal! She grabbed the offer! Mama made the transaction more solid by asking M to swear in front of the God's idols in the house, by placing her palm on the ground. M followed without any hesitation. The deal was sealed! Mama was convinced that maybe since the cajoling and explaining wasn't working, giving in might! That she would get bored, realize school is more fun and would stop the daily drama. Much to mami's agony, he made this decision and left to work.
M spent the day doing everything she could - stealthily feeding spoons of sugar from the kitchen to ants crawling on the compound wall outside, watching TV, trying to drape one of her mom's sarees and the like. What fun! School was torture, an establishment for strangling the freedom of mind and the creative use of time! Phew! Needless to say, the day passed in the blink of an eye.
It was the next morning now. After brushing her teeth, M started her usual - "I don't want to go to school"! Mama was not totally shocked but this irked him. He asked her " Did you not promise me yesterday, did you not swear by putting your palm on the ground in front of God?". M's reply after thinking for a bit - "Yeah, but you didn't see I kept my palm a half inch above the ground, I didn't really touch the floor!"
Mama laughed his heart out at the answer. He was actually laughing out loud even as he narrated this incident to me. We were amused at M's ingenuity and wit! Recounting this tale actually replaced my sadness with a chuckle and I am glad I entered work with a smile!
I dropped my daughter off at day care this morning. Nothing unusual, but tis a monday morning and she lingered and looked at me with longing eyes as I was waving bye to her. She wanted to be with me rather than go into her daycare and I wanted to be with her much rather than come in to work. We gazed at each other like lovers separated by society,family and circumstances. The door closed in my face and as I got into my car and started driving, an incident narrated by my uncle came to mind. This happened several years ago when my uncle's daughter, cousin M was in kindergarten.
Mama, as I call my uncle, used to drop off his daughter at school and proceed to his workplace. M always whined and fussed about going to school. Everyday, mami and/or mama had to explain to her why she needs to go to school, how it's important for her to get a good education that would make her independent and add value and blah blah! And she was never convinced. They'd show her examples of her older sibling, cousins and other kids who also went to school. And she'd point to every kid she knew in the 0-3 yrs age group who got to stay home. Explaining the age logic had no effect on her. This process would also delay mama in getting to work. Sometimes, when M lay on the floor protesting, mama would exclaim "The only difference between me and her is that I cannot lay on the floor and cry like her, I too do not feel like going to work!"
One morning as M was doing her usual routine of " I don't feel like going to school!", mama quite unexpectedly said in a fit of frustration, "Okay, you don't have to go. You get to stay home today." M was overjoyed to hear this and immediately overcome by skepticism at this sudden gratuitousness. Mama continued,"But tomorrow morning, you'll get ready without any complaining, absolutely no fussing!"
Suited her just fine. Who has seen tomorrow? Today is here and now and the real deal! She grabbed the offer! Mama made the transaction more solid by asking M to swear in front of the God's idols in the house, by placing her palm on the ground. M followed without any hesitation. The deal was sealed! Mama was convinced that maybe since the cajoling and explaining wasn't working, giving in might! That she would get bored, realize school is more fun and would stop the daily drama. Much to mami's agony, he made this decision and left to work.
M spent the day doing everything she could - stealthily feeding spoons of sugar from the kitchen to ants crawling on the compound wall outside, watching TV, trying to drape one of her mom's sarees and the like. What fun! School was torture, an establishment for strangling the freedom of mind and the creative use of time! Phew! Needless to say, the day passed in the blink of an eye.
It was the next morning now. After brushing her teeth, M started her usual - "I don't want to go to school"! Mama was not totally shocked but this irked him. He asked her " Did you not promise me yesterday, did you not swear by putting your palm on the ground in front of God?". M's reply after thinking for a bit - "Yeah, but you didn't see I kept my palm a half inch above the ground, I didn't really touch the floor!"
Mama laughed his heart out at the answer. He was actually laughing out loud even as he narrated this incident to me. We were amused at M's ingenuity and wit! Recounting this tale actually replaced my sadness with a chuckle and I am glad I entered work with a smile!
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